Though I am new to the splort, I have gathered what I know to be a series of fundamental truths and rights of Blaseball fans. As a loyal, albeit fresh, follower of the Hawai’i Fridays, it deeply pains me to upset the vibes of any set of proceedings, but I feel I must speak. All who know the game know that the two main methods of participation for fans are the act of voting and the act of betting, which both depend inherently on possessing an amount of money to perform. This is where I come in; I began to participate in the cultural phenomenon known as Blaseball on the day of the postseason of Season 10. I had little in the ways of wealth; I could afford either to idolize a player or to cast a vote in the upcoming election, not both. Upon a careful vibe examination with my compatriots, I was advised to cast a vote, and save the rest of my funds for betting. I was assured at every turn, however, that I was not far from a decent sum of coin, as Eat The Rich was soon to go into effect. I waited with bated breath for the 1% to be reabsorbed into the fabric of the fans, for their wave to return to the ocean; I had selected Nagomi McDaniel as my soon-to-be idol, and only required a few more coins to place her upon the pedestal. I was appalled when the coin required simply did not appear. I come before you today not only as a fan, but as a person, and appeal to your sensibilities; please, let us consume the most wealthy members of this beautiful splort. For the economy.
C. Yolkey
Eat The Rich Class Action 