Audio Entry: Tartarus Boatman Fund

(When you click this image, you’ll get taken to a Google Drive site where the audio is hosted)

The optimal experience for this evidence is through listening, so if you’re able, please listen by clicking the image above, or right here! It is really well done. However, if you’re not able or not in a position to do so, we’ve done our best to transcribe the piece below:

(Spooky noises in the background)

Hey, I brought this up on Twitter but I want to enter it into the record, officially: So I volunteer for the Tartarus Boatman Fund. We’re a charitable organization for the dead who can’t afford to cross into Hades proper, and things are pretty tight over here what with us being you know… a non-profit, and also there being a limitless number of the dead – past, present and future. And we really rely on Eat the Rich payouts to keep the lights on, the wheels turning. So without this season’s payout, we- we’re pretty backed up. It’s getting pretty bad.

(Spooky slow voice, interrupting: He pushed me!)

Hey, C’mon guys let’s keep this in an orderly line.

(Back & forth argument about whether or not someone was pushed intensifying)

We’re all here to get to our eternal reward or endless suffering. THere’s no need to be rude. Ok.

(Argument between the dead continues)

So yeah, I’d estimate that we have maybe a week til the dead start to overflow the gates and spill out into the land of the living, sooo… unless we get some cash info, that’s going to be your October and maybe November & December.

We’ve gotta get eat the rich started again or Christmas is going to be… real spooky.

%d bloggers like this: