You owe the Sunbeams manager $20, Parker.

Parker personally owes me, the manager of the Hellmouth Sunbeams Pseudo-official Twitter Account, twenty (20) American dollars. I don’t remember what it was for, specifically. A couple sandwiches, maybe. A used copy of Knack 2 for the PlayStation 4. But there is a debt, and that debt is unpaid. Consider this evidence as to theContinue reading “You owe the Sunbeams manager $20, Parker.”

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Classified Spy Document

A classified spy document. It’s mostly still redacted, but I think the non-redacted parts should still be useful. And maybe you can magically un-redact it. Also, you can’t tell anyone who sent you this, for security reasons. In fact, you can’t tell people anyone sent this at all. If anyone asks, you found this stuckContinue reading “Classified Spy Document”

Dale Turn Down Mysterious Money Laundering Offer

Leaked galley print of the first page of the Miami Herald. Embargoed, shared by an anonymous source. Transcript follows image (Editor’s note: thanks for providing the transcript Helps a lot with accessibility!) Certainly not Wave Larry. BELOVED BLASEBALL TEAM MIAMI DALE TURNS DOWN LAUNDERING DEAL By Wave Larry // Pictures by Mister Wife The MiamiContinue reading “Dale Turn Down Mysterious Money Laundering Offer”

Parker Confession?

(This probably isn’t legit, but someone submitted it, and it could be, right? We’re just passing along the evidence as we receive it.) Found this on the commissioner’s desk, also accidentally scanned my spicy milk recipe so that’s my bad, but the Commissioner stuff is all legit. jt islandemoji Image text: From the desk ofContinue reading “Parker Confession?”